Last night a pretty young woman recognized me from my writing this column for Synthesis. I was in a crowded restaurant, a pizza and pasta joint in a mountain town. I don’t know exactly how I bought it up but at a certain point this woman whose name I can’t recall pushed back her chair and asked if I was “Bob Howard from the Synthesis?” I affirmed that I was and she extended her hand towards me to shake.
Then I woke up. Seriously – it was a dream. How’s that for the ego working overtime to get a little gratification?
Talk About a Bad Luck Run
If you are ever feeling sorry for yourself here is a story that will make your situation seem a lot less miserable. Apparently video footage has turned up of one of these Chinese Muslims known as Uighurs (pronounced roughly “wiggers”) being tortured by Al Queada. Then after those jerks were through with him, we went ahead locked the poor bastard up in Guantanamo for seven years. It seems that he may have tried to join Al Queada, but after only two weeks they’d decided he was a spy and so they tortured him and kicked him out. Then, in a stunning display of the competence of our nation’s intelligence services, we decided he was a member of Al Queada, and as such a terrorist, so we decided to lock him up for awhile. It turns out that none of these Uighurs pose much of a threat to anyone, but now nobody knows what to do with them. They’ve been ordered to be released by a U.S. Court – but nobody will take them in! They can’t go back to China for fear of religious persecution, and, save for the island nation of Palau, nobody is willing to let these religio-political pariahs settle in their country. To complicate the situation even further, the Uighurs themselves are wary of Palau’s offer because they are not guaranteed any protections from the Chinese government. ¡Aye Caramba!
How to Make Money On-Line
I finally figured out the secret to making money on-line. I’ve been searching for forms of alternative income. I know you’re thinking to yourself – ‘you write a high-profile column for the Synthesis, surely you must be rich beyond your wildest dreams!’ Well sure, I make big money here, particularly after you factor in the black market Duffy Buck sales, but Trish and I live a pretty lavish lifestyle and a dollar just doesn’t go as far as it used to in this mangled, burned out wreck we graciously refer to as an “economy.” Yes things have gotten a little tight around here. So in a moment of desperation I clicked on one of those “make money from home!” links and started entering my information.
Well I didn’t glean much information from that on-line visit, but over the course of the next few days I learned exactly how to make a ton of money on-line. What you want to do is gather people’s e-mail addresses and then sell them to the highest bidder. Since my on-line research I have been literally bombarded with e-mails from companies offering everything from home loans to quick cash to dates for lonely singles. My in-box and my spam box have been virtually over-flowing with possible solicited but definitely unwanted information. You learn from your mistakes I suppose – following that logic someday I should be an extremely wise man.
Insanity in Iranity
Last week I wrote that I wasn’t too impressed with the choices Iranians have for President and I’m still not. To quote Ralph Nader: “Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb.” But there is a truly interesting development happening and that is a rift opening up within the supreme council – the group of clerics who determine the country’s “Supreme Leader.” This is where real, genuine, 1776 style reform could be happening right before our very eyes! This could signify the cracks in the dyke that will ultimately bring down theocratic rule in Iran. Clerics have been openly marching in protest in support of the reform party – in direct defiance to the wishes of the Supreme Leader.
This I will be keeping a close eye on.
Hey I just noticed this will be the last column I write before the Fourth of July Weekend! So Happy Independence Day to you and yours. If you are so inclined, drink a few cold beers and eat a few tofu dogs, take in the fireworks, and take a moment to reflect on the freedoms we have grown so accustomed to in this country. People are dying for smaller freedoms in Tehran.
madbob@madbob.com
Then I woke up. Seriously – it was a dream. How’s that for the ego working overtime to get a little gratification?
Talk About a Bad Luck Run
If you are ever feeling sorry for yourself here is a story that will make your situation seem a lot less miserable. Apparently video footage has turned up of one of these Chinese Muslims known as Uighurs (pronounced roughly “wiggers”) being tortured by Al Queada. Then after those jerks were through with him, we went ahead locked the poor bastard up in Guantanamo for seven years. It seems that he may have tried to join Al Queada, but after only two weeks they’d decided he was a spy and so they tortured him and kicked him out. Then, in a stunning display of the competence of our nation’s intelligence services, we decided he was a member of Al Queada, and as such a terrorist, so we decided to lock him up for awhile. It turns out that none of these Uighurs pose much of a threat to anyone, but now nobody knows what to do with them. They’ve been ordered to be released by a U.S. Court – but nobody will take them in! They can’t go back to China for fear of religious persecution, and, save for the island nation of Palau, nobody is willing to let these religio-political pariahs settle in their country. To complicate the situation even further, the Uighurs themselves are wary of Palau’s offer because they are not guaranteed any protections from the Chinese government. ¡Aye Caramba!
How to Make Money On-Line
I finally figured out the secret to making money on-line. I’ve been searching for forms of alternative income. I know you’re thinking to yourself – ‘you write a high-profile column for the Synthesis, surely you must be rich beyond your wildest dreams!’ Well sure, I make big money here, particularly after you factor in the black market Duffy Buck sales, but Trish and I live a pretty lavish lifestyle and a dollar just doesn’t go as far as it used to in this mangled, burned out wreck we graciously refer to as an “economy.” Yes things have gotten a little tight around here. So in a moment of desperation I clicked on one of those “make money from home!” links and started entering my information.
Well I didn’t glean much information from that on-line visit, but over the course of the next few days I learned exactly how to make a ton of money on-line. What you want to do is gather people’s e-mail addresses and then sell them to the highest bidder. Since my on-line research I have been literally bombarded with e-mails from companies offering everything from home loans to quick cash to dates for lonely singles. My in-box and my spam box have been virtually over-flowing with possible solicited but definitely unwanted information. You learn from your mistakes I suppose – following that logic someday I should be an extremely wise man.
Insanity in Iranity
Last week I wrote that I wasn’t too impressed with the choices Iranians have for President and I’m still not. To quote Ralph Nader: “Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb.” But there is a truly interesting development happening and that is a rift opening up within the supreme council – the group of clerics who determine the country’s “Supreme Leader.” This is where real, genuine, 1776 style reform could be happening right before our very eyes! This could signify the cracks in the dyke that will ultimately bring down theocratic rule in Iran. Clerics have been openly marching in protest in support of the reform party – in direct defiance to the wishes of the Supreme Leader.
This I will be keeping a close eye on.
Hey I just noticed this will be the last column I write before the Fourth of July Weekend! So Happy Independence Day to you and yours. If you are so inclined, drink a few cold beers and eat a few tofu dogs, take in the fireworks, and take a moment to reflect on the freedoms we have grown so accustomed to in this country. People are dying for smaller freedoms in Tehran.
madbob@madbob.com
