Madmen and Monkeys

I'll tell you what, when you get older, you come to the realization that you don't know much. I do anyway. It's an odd phenomenon – I would have expected that I would know more as I get older. It doesn't work that way though. I know more facts, and I have a little more knowledge of myself, but with every passing year I come to understand that I know even less than I thought I did about simple human nature. We are random creatures. I suppose that's what I finally have come to realize. Trying to get your head wrapped around human nature, I don't know if it's a good idea.

Fundamentalism

I have little tolerance for fundamentalists – and I'm now willing to admit that might stem from a little bit of jealousy. Fundamentalists know exactly what they are here for – they have a pretty solid understanding of their purpose, and the purpose of life and existence in general. Sure, I may think that understanding is based on nonsense, bad science, and a certain amount of fear of the unknown, but that makes no difference to them. Their purpose is to establish a relationship with God, maintain that relationship, increase their intimacy with their God, and then die and meet their God. Life couldn't be simpler.

The rest of us, we have to wade through all this incredible magnitude of information and belief, culture and science, and somehow distill from this a working world-view – something that gets us through the long days and the cold nights. It is no small task.

When Sex Ruled the World

When I was younger I used to think the world ran on sex. I thought everything, boiled down to its essence, was based on people trying to get with one another. Not in order to pro-create, because I've never been interested in that, but simply for the sheer, ecstatic act (or acts) of sexuality. A businessman works his way up the ladder so he can make more money, buy nicer things, woo a beautiful woman, and have sex with her. A politician goes through the rigmarole of the campaign, puts their life out their for everyone to see, and attains a position of power so they can attract beautiful women and have sex with them. Everything, in my mind from the age of about 13 through 30, revolved around sex and sexuality. That's how I thought (think), and so I assumed that's how everyone else did too.

I see now that my world-view was completely egocentric, and that people are motivated by all kinds of emotions other than just screwing. I understand that empirically, intellectually, but it still doesn't make sense to me on an emotional level. Why would people really want all the hassles that go along with attaining power if it weren't for all the hot sex? It breaks down though, because, while I'd like to think Presidents and Senators are orgying it up every night in some dirty D.C. hotels, another part of me, my brain I guess, knows this is entirely improbable at best. No, it seems these people actually want power for the sake of power. It seems that the businessman may actually want money for the sake of having money. Because really, even high-class prostitutes don't require billionaire clients... or do they? The paranoid part of my brain, it swells sometimes. I can't imagine the brain is a static organ – blood pumps to it and certain parts swell and contract. Maybe there are billion dollar orgies somewhere and shipping magnates are making it with powerful Senators. Maybe the world really does run on sex. No, stop it! Stop it... what was I talking about?

We're not all the same. Hell, none of us are the same. None of us share the precise motivation, purpose, or identity. Space separates and defines us.

Fussy Monkeys

I hear they are raising the fees at the schools again, and that students and professors are striking on college campuses across the state. What fussy monkeys we are – with our shiny speeding cars and our Wal-Mart superstores. A colleague of mine told me that, in spite of the genocide that nearly extincted them, the Native Americans have never had it so good. I guess he meant the trappings of modern convenience. My head swam a little. People lived for tens of thousands of years a certain way, with an ingrained understanding of the world around them, with a purpose that was so sublimely woven into their way of life that they were not apart from the world around them. There was no schism. Now they have cars and bills and casinos. I am confused – this is better?

madbob@madbob.com