Monday, February 20, 2017

That Time I went to a Donald Trump Rally

Trump Rally
Friday, June 3rd
Redding Municipal Airport, Redding, CA
So at about 10 in the morning of Friday June 3rd, I was goofing around on FaceBook and sort of threatening to go to the Trump rally in Redding when I looked at the information page and realized it started at 1 p.m. In that instant I decided I was going to go.
I guess I was sort of confused about how long it would take to get to Redding from Los Molinos so I more or less ran in, told my wife Trish I was heading to the Trump rally in Redding, to which she responded "be careful and don't buy anything..." in her defense she was sort of half asleep when I told her, and then I left.
I was talking about really dressing the part: Olive drab jumpsuit, American flag/bald eagle ball-cap, Redwing work boots - but I felt like I was pressed for time so I left as I was dressed - black boot-cut polyester Wranglers, camouflaged foam clogs, and my Pabst Blue Ribbon tee shirt. No shower, two-day stubble. Oh well.
Then I was on the road, heading north up I-5. I overestimated the time it would take to get there and ended up in a make-shift grass parking lot outside the Redding Municipal Airport by 10:45 - Trump was scheduled to speak at 1:00 p.m. - 2 + hours to go.
The first thing that really hits me is the largest American flag I've ever seen suspended from a two hundred foot high crane stationed in the middle of the parking lot. I walk right under it - the cable holding the flag is attached to a massive concrete block. I look up at this incredible old glory on steroids and get vertigo. What am I getting myself into? In a bit of a daze I stumble off towards the entrance to the airport.
I hit my first obstacle when I attempted to enter. I was asked for a ticket. Huh? I explained "I don't have a ticket, can I buy one?" (Immediately contradicting Trish's second directive). The lady sort of laughed and pitied me. She said, "no, you can download one for free and then show your phone to the security guards" to which I replied "I don't have a phone." Which is true, sort of. I have a $10 TracFone, but it doesn't really do internet - it barely does phone calls. The lady talked to another guy who then said he'd talk to the fucking secret service!
I'm like what, so I stand there for a while with my thumb up my ass wondering if I have driven out here for nothing. I'm watching all these people filter in past me. After a few minutes of me standing around feeling dumb, this really tall dude in a black suit, sunglasses, and a red Trump hat comes over and asks me a few questions:
"Are you a Trump supporter?"
"Sure I am."
"Really?"
"Sure. I mean, I'm really excited to see him speak." A couple of lies and a truth. I was excited to see the whole thing. The secret service guy gives me the once over and then says, "sure, go on in." After that we exchanged pleasantries for the rest of the event. He was perfect for the job because he was so tall he could look over the whole crowd and check everything out. He was probably about 6'7" or 6'8" tall. He was really nice.
Anyway, I'm in. Almost immediately I run into Doug LaMalfa, or current Representative, who has already blocked me from his FaceBook page because I was being an asshole about something. He doesn't know this of course. I stand there waiting for him to finish chatting with someone else and then I extend my hand, "Mr. LaMalfa, pleased to meet you." And we shake hands and I introduce myself and he sees my shirt and says "Pabst Blue Ribbon, I bet speaker of the house Paul Ryan would like that shirt, I think they're from Wisconsin." That doesn't sound right to me, but I'm like "yeah, I think they've been sold a time or two since then." I wanted to say something about how I think now maybe they're owned by a Russian company and globalism and LaMalfa's like "yeah, whatever." But he was cordial. All these politicians are smooth talkers.
So now I'm past LaMalfa and just figuring out what's going on.
I laugh as I realize the booming PA system is cranking REM's "It's the end of the world as we know it..." There's a podium set up and a couple of water stations and some shade, porta-potties, and a whole stage right in the middle of the spectating area reserved for the press. Press people are milling around, taking photos, talking to people. I met a photographer for the New York Times. He was really generous with his time and gave me a run-down on the whole affair - he'd been following Trump on this particular leg of the campaign tour. “He'll usually speak for about an hour,” the photographer informs me. “But he might cut it short today because it's so hot.”
I ran into Gregory Cheadle – he's a candidate for the California 1st District Congressional seat. His simple campaign signs feature the silhouette of the famous DaVinci sculpture called "The Thinker," and below that it the one-word slogan: "THINK." I always assumed he'd be kind of a stern guy but it turns out he's really warm. I was like "hey Mr. Cheadle, it's an honor to meet you," because I'm adept at glad-handing and he responded: "Call me Gregory, I don't do all these 'misters.'" Then he laughed and clapped me on the shoulder and I really liked that interaction. I'm telling you, these pols know how to work people.
[note: I had left the rally before the “there's my African-American” comment that the national media has siezed on. According to the Redding Searchlight it was Cheadle to whom that comment from Trump was directed.]
I recognized Summer Schapelle in the audience and fan-boyed on her a little bit - she is a terrific singer from Redding who was featured on the last season of "The Voice." Man, the who's who of Redding were in attendance for Mr. Trump.
There was a plane on the tarmac but it was kind of run-down looking. I asked my friend the secret service guy if that was Trump's plane and he answered "No, his plane says "TRUMP" on it" and I was like "duh," but I didn't say that out loud. "That's the press plane," he explained. Aha.
I spoke with a couple of reporters from a publication out of Paris. I won't mention the name because this next part might be kind of libelous, or slander? I'm not sure which. Anyway, I'm talking to a reporter and a photographer and the photographer says "it's hot." And I answer "yeah." It is about 104 degrees, which really for June in Redding is no big deal. It can get as high as 115. The photographer is sweating like a pig, obviously not used to this kind of weather. Then the reporter says to me "are you a Trump supporter" and I say, "no, not really. I'm more of a politics junkie." Then jokingly I say "I'll pretend I am if you want me to." And he goes: "Really?" I'm a little flabbergasted at this point, because yeah, sure I used to make up sources when I wrote articles for my high-school newspaper, but this is a guy from a real paper. He told me they were looking for a whole family of Trump supporters. I ended up saying "well, you'll probably find one here." I sort of wish I'd faked the interview for them, because it would be really funny to find the article and then tell people "that was me! That was all me!" But they'd probably think I was lying anyway. I swear that anecdote is true.
I had a lot of time to walk around and talk to people. I talked to a friendly man for awhile about our shared enjoyment of the author Michael Connelly, and a few others. Neither of us like Patterson. Too schmarmy. I can tell I am not the only non-Trump supporter here, I feel like I am sharing conspiratorial winks here and there, but nobody is here to cause trouble. This is Redding after all, as someone says "Trump Country." It turns out to have been a very safe place to go and take in this phenomenon. There are some hard looking dudes though - I see a lot of veterans, some genuine hill-folk, and a fair share of muscle-men sporting prison tattoos. These people look like if there was some trouble, they wouldn't mind jumping into it. But there isn't, this is a tame crowd. The atmosphere is mostly jovial, excited, under control. Aside from that the heat keeps everyone either crowding under the shade tents or gasping for breath.
"You Shook me all Night Long" blasts through the PA system.
People had absolutely tremendous t-shirts on. I so wish I'd brought my camera just for that, but I blazed out without even thinking about it. Here's a list of the ones I can remember:
Chairman Oba-Mao (with a picture of a smiling Obama in a Chairman Mao style hat)
GUNS AND MOSES (Guns and Roses, get it, huh? Huh?)
Hillary for Prison 2016 - which was funny because it looked exactly like a Hillary for President shirt and so people kept asking this guy if he was a Hillary supporter when in fact he was one of the more kooky, hate-filled human beings at the rally. I heard him sputtering something about "pedophile and serial rapist..." as I slowly edged away from him.
A really tall, big dude was wearing a shirt that read: "THE FEW, THE PROUD, THE TAXPAYERS." I got a terrific laugh out of that one.
There were a ton of Jefferson shirts, and a lot of basic "Trump for President" shirts.
But I think my favorite shirt of the evening featured a kind of a stylized picture of Trump's head and a caption reading:
TRUMP - THERE WILL BE HELL TOUPEE
http://rlv.zcache.com/donald_trump_2016_therell_be_hell_tou…
(her's was better than this, but it was the closest I could find)
I would think that shirt would be insulting to Trump but the woman wearing it seemed to be a full on Trump supporter.
Later on I struck up a conversation with a couple of reporters from "InfoWars." One dude looked super hard. I wouldn't want to fuck with him. I was like "oh, infowars, I like that site!" Which was kind of a lie.
There was only really one agitator there, this one guy who frankly I think is kind of giving Sanders' supporters a bad name. He came in a Sanders' shirt, which was no big deal, no one I saw really cared. But he was acting sketchy, prancing around, getting in people's faces, then filming it the whole time.
Most of the people there were just laughing or bored with him, a few people reacted, but there was nothing physical. I tried to talk to the guy for a second but he was really weird, he wouldn't talk. It seemed evident to me he came with the intention of creating a scene so he could exploit it. My friend the secret service guy talked to him a bunch of times, I was right next to them as it happened. The secret service guy was assuring the Sanders shirt dude that "you're welcome to stay, but you can't be making other people uncomfortable."
Well as you and I could probably guess the guy kept pushing it until the security guards and the secret service really had no choice but to escort him out to the parking lot. At that point he turned on his camera and filmed himself, pointed it at the cops and the secret service, and basically created a scene that was way out of proportion to what had really transpired. A few people yelled at him on the way out, but it was pretty half-hearted.
I'm a little saddened to see that he has since posted a video of the episode, completely mis-characterizing how he acted and how he was treated - claiming he was kicked out solely because he was wearing a Sanders shirt. From my point of view that was not at all how it went down. Guy clearly came with an agenda.
Funny thing to me though, if you're going to agitate, at least have the self-control to wait until the candidate actually shows up. Trump was still an hour away when they escorted the guy out to the parking lot.
Whatever.
A local representative comes out at about quarter til and gives an invocation. I bow my head and sort of marvel at the surrealism of it all - thank you whatever weird lord thing coincidence or scientific serendipity put me here on this planet at this time to witness this bizarre marvel of human interaction. What the fucking fuck am I doing here?
A few minutes later someone leads us through the Pledge of Allegiance - right hand or left? Right, right? Fuck, elementary school indoctrination don't fail me now. I whiff on "indivisible" but I don't think anyone notices.
Anyway, now we're getting close to the big show. People are getting excited - it's 1:00 o'clock, still no Donald. Up until now the music had been mostly classic rock - AC/DC, Stones, Neil Young. Suddenly it changes to a huge, booming symphony of horns and drums. I don't know what it is, but Wagner-esque - though that would be too on the nose! 1:10, a gleam on the horizon, here comes the Donald! His Boeing 757 even looks golden in the early afternoon light.
The plane comes in low as if making to land, 50 feet off the ground, and then re-ascends, off into the sky! It makes a giant circle as it flies around the airport, around the city. For a moment it flies before Mount Shasta, ghostly in the distance, then it flies above the massive American flag in the parking lot. It probably takes 10 minutes for the plane to make the circle and then it is coming in for landing again. Everyone is awestruck, myself included. A fellow rally-goer leans over to me and exclaims: “That's what you do when you're a billionaire!” The PA is still blasting that crazy symphony music, on repeat, looped. I mean, it is a spectacle, this is big. Say what you will about Donald Trump but that motherfucker knows how to make a goddamn entrance!
The second time around I feel like the plane is going to do another fake-out on us, maybe they won't even land, but it does! People are going apoplectic. People are jumping up and down, young women are shedding tears of ecstasy! I have to admit a tear welled up in the corner of my eye - not because of Trump, but just that fucking majesty of the spectacle! It was huge! It was crazy! It was so much larger than life it was hard to even fathom. The music is still blaring as the plane slowly turns and makes it's way back towards the podium. It stops, someone is wheeling the stairwell towards the door.
The door opens! There's a white haired man there - the Donald? Of course not, Trump doesn't open the door of his own plane. The man signals for the people maneuvering the staircase to bring it closer, then it is connected. An entourage of men in suits descends and the people are going bananas! I'm laughing at this point, the whole thing is so fucking over the top!
Six guys cruise out, then seven, eight, looking rich, well fed, well bred, groomed, immaculate manifestations of wealth and power.
Then finally the Donald!
Moving a little slower than the rest, looking a little heavier, but so eminently recognizable, donning his newest ball-cap, this one a gift from the NRA in recognition of their recent endorsement.
The speech, I dunno, it gets a little anti-climactic at this point. He does the prerequisite "Redding! We love Redding!" bullshit. I appreciate the fact that Donald speaks extemporaneously - this is not your classic scripted, practiced stump speech. He is definitely talking off the cuff, and that's refreshing. He starts out with a statistic from a job report that came out yesterday and segues from there. The problem with a totally off the cuff speech though is that it's also sort of non-cohesive. He isn't really explaining policy but more or less bouncing from one hot button issue to the next. But the crowd eats it up. At some point he pisses me off because he keeps referring to the Warriors as "San Francisco's basketball team." He says it twice and after the second time I shout "OAKLAND!" to which the audience looks around as if someone is speaking in a foreign language but no one seems to pin-point me precisely. Donald doesn't seem to hear me at all, which is probably okay.
He does get a few good zingers in there, ridiculing Hillary for her tele-prompted speech - he repeatedly calls her weak and soft. He sort of gives props to Bernie "We love Bernie, what a mess he's got going there." At one point he gets into Hillary's e-mail stuff and then manages to wrap Huma Abedin, Hillary's right-hand woman, and her husband Anthony Wiener into the mix.
"I wouldn't want to get any tweets from Anthony Wiener," Trump states. "Would you?" The crowd erupts. I'm laughing. The guy is fucking funny. He definitely knows how to work a crowd.
I come to think about it after this speech, which was really just a ramble, and I think part of Trump's attraction lies in the fact that he is sort of like those ink blot tests - you see what you want to see. He shifts his positions so fluidly and consistently he is bound to say something you want to hear. He said a couple of things that I totally agree with - he said we should negotiate with North Korea. "Why not?" He asks, then adds: "I wouldn't go over there!" But then he goes on: "Maybe nothing good comes out of it, maybe something good comes out of it." Then in classic Donald fashion "I'm pretty sure something good would come out of it."
He makes some common sense arguments: "Vladimir Putin says I'm a genius and would be a great leader. And the critics tell me I should disavow those statements. Really? He's saying I'm a genius and I'm supposed to disavow that?" I'm laughing as I write this.
But he also says some things that send shivers down my spine: "I don't want Japan to have nuclear weapons, I want Japan to pay us the money that it costs us to defend them." He says the same of South Korea, the Ukraine... it sounds like he's angling the U.S. to enter into some sort of worldwide protection racket. (Then again, maybe we already are. I should talk to the infowars guys about this.)
He touches on the notorious wall, but he knows this is California, so he doesn't dwell on it. "We'll build that wall, don't worry about it," he says dismissively before moving onto the next topic. There are several spontaneous chants of "USA! USA!" The true believers have smiles on their faces stretching from ear to ear. I'm smiling from ear to ear too, but not for the same reasons.
I do sort of zone out at some point. The heat and the crowd and the general bombast of the afternoon have worn me down. Also I'm supposed to tutor at 5:00, which means I have to get back to Los Molinos, shower, change, then head back up to Red Bluff for the afternoon session. I decide to beat it to the door before he finishes his "speech" and beat the traffic. As I leave I hear him ranting about China and Obama, saying he wishes America could do the kinds of things China does. That gives me pause.
Then I am out, there are hundreds of people outside - the rally filled up. I hear disgruntled voices as I leave, they aren't letting anyone else in. "This is bullshit" someone opines. Bingo!
It takes me a little while to find my truck and then it takes me a little while to figure out how to get out of the damned dead-grass parking lot. But I'm off the lot by 2:15 and heading down I-5 and letting the old 2-70 air conditioner kick in. Home a little after three, call my client, she asks me: "Can we wait until Monday?" Sweet salvation - liquor store, beer, wine. Olympia is on sale for $6.99 a 12-pack. I'm a tall can of Mickey's and three Oly's in as I write this last sentence.
[final note - after spellchecking and Face-booking this I am now a Mickey's tall-can and 4 Oly's in, and feeling pretty good.]


1 comment:

Emily Shorette said...

If you have a minute, I’d really appreciate it if you took a look at Emily’s Virtual Rocket. This is a serious newsblog which has been taken from e-newspapers and e-magazines from around the world, with an emphasis on transgender issues. Also, with his election, I look for articles which critique Donald Trump.

I hope you enjoy this. Please paste the following:

Emilysvirtualrocket.blogspot.com

If you like it, please consider putting it among your favorite blogs. I would greatly appreciate it.


Emily