My Three Biggest Problems

Painting I did with gouache and pen on paper

Okay, as I embark on this journey towards self-employment and artistic expression, I have had to take the time to do some serious self-evaluation. I've come to the conclusion that I have three fairly significant problems that drain my time and energy, and handicap my ability to create.

1. Drinking:

I drink too much. I'm not, I don't think, what you'd call a full-blown alcoholic, but I am a pretty steady, consistent drinker of wine and beer. It's caused me to gain weight, lose valuable time, and spend a lot more money than I should on alcohol.

I don't expect to ever completely give up drinking. One of my favorite hobbies is wine and beer making. I'm hoping to learn how to moderate my drinking so that it becomes something I want to do occasionally, instead of a habit I have of having a few glasses of wine every night.

2. Exercise:

The flip-side of drinking too much, I exercise too little! This leaves me feeling slovenly and low energy. I used to be quite an athlete, but it is difficult for me to exercise when there is no "point" to it other than being healthy.

In high school I played three different sports - football, wrestling, and track and field, where I threw discus and shot-put. These sports kept me active in spite of my tendency towards sloth.

In college I took up surfing. Daily adventures in the ocean staved off the ill-effects of alcohol and marijuana consumption and this, combined with youth, kept me pretty fit.

After college I moved to the mountains and snowboarded for a season. My core has never been more solid than after snowboarding for several hours a day for months on end.

But then I moved to Los Angeles and became much more sedentary. Now I'm in the country, where I fool myself into believing that the work I do on our garden is enough, but I know it's not. I know because of the way I feel, and the amount I weigh.

I'm 51 years old, 52 in March, and the weight doesn't come off like it used to. I stand 6 feet tall and consistently weight between 220 and 230 pounds. I took a month of drinking this year and dropped 10 pounds almost overnight! So I know alcohol is an issue.

Cutting back on the drinking and increasing my exercise will definitely lead to more energy and creative output.

3. Social Media:

I spend far too much wasted time on social media. I like social media, and I think it can have value, but I don't think I'm using it well right now. I am planing on mapping out my weeks so that I have a dedicated amount of time I spend on social media, and use that time effectively to promote my own creations, instead of arguing with strangers over things I can't change anyway.

I'm sure there will be varying degrees of success and failure as I navigate this new situation. I plan on being kind to myself as I figure things out.

Thanks for reading!

check out my website at: madbob.com

(It's crude af right now, Wordpress is a complete mystery to me. I'm going to be spending time each week updating it with my various projects.)

Kyle Rittenhouse and the Stupidity of Gun Culture

 I haven't written much about Kyle Rittenhouse. From what I have read it looks like he'll likely be acquitted, or the thing will end up in a mistrial. Apparently the jury has already requested a mistrial twice and been denied.

Frankly he probably did kill those two men and wound the third in an act of self defense. And this is my problem with gun culture.

Because we all know he never would have been there if he didn't have a gun.

And he shouldn't have been there, because a 17 year old boy doesn't have the experience to be successful in that environment.

His mom says he would have died if he hadn't "brung" his gun with him. Fuck lady, he also wouldn't have died if you hadn't fucking driven him there. How these people manage to tie their shoes is beyond me.

Gun advocates love to talk about how a "good guy with a gun" can solve a bad situation. It seems like that happens about once in every million shooting instances, but I'm not sure statistics go over real big in the gun crowd. I think you're something like 5 times more likely to be killed by a gun if you have a gun in your house than if you don't, but that figure doesn't seem to cause much hesitation in the gun-inclined group.

A gun is known in some circles as an "equalizer." Meaning some pudgy little shit like Kyle Rittenhouse can go out and be just as deadly as a highly trained mixed martial artist - even more so. All he has to do is squeeze that little trigger and now David is taking down Goliath.

I'd be willing to bet that the gun that is supposed to keep us all polite is in fact the object that starts a fair amount of fighting. People who have no business fighting get into fights because the gun they are holding tells them they can fight. It proves they can kill.

It's grotesque. How we got to a point where taking a life is so trivial, even celebrated - I'll never understand it. I'd never want that kind of blood on my hands and now this 18 year old, 17 at the time of the shooting, is going to be warped and twisted and perverted because he took lives, and one "side" thinks that's awful while the other "side" thinks he's a fucking hero. Of course he's going to go to the side saying he's a fucking hero. We all want acceptance in this life.

I hate it all. I hate the rioting, the looting, the violence. I hate that this is all solvable but we won't solve it. And I'm not talking about getting rid of guns, I'm talking about getting rid of poverty. That won't make every problem disappear, but it will sure go a long way towards it. People riot and loot because they see themselves in an economic situation from which there is no escape.

A whole lot of pressure could be released by simply easing poverty. By implementing fair wages, fair housing prices, by starting a universal basic income. People are getting richer than any human has ever been in this country. Why is the bottom still living on the streets? How is anyone in this country being allowed to go hungry?

I guess I've gotten off the gun culture topic here, but it all ties together. Poverty is at the root of the vast majority of criminality. Eradicate poverty and watch crime rates drop like they've never dropped before, and then law enforcement can focus on dealing with the actual criminal class instead of the victims of bad domestic policy.

The Resurrection of the Blog - Achilles' Chill

 I'm blogging again. My mental health is so shit right now. I dealt with Trump by drinking and the Pandemic by drinking even more and even though he's out of office Trump won't go away and the Pandemic is still raging, so the drinking hasn't really slowed. It's not good. The depression medicine I'm taking doesn't seem to be cutting the mustard, but how could it when I'm drowning myself in depressants every night? But damn I do love red wine. My Achille's chill.

Maybe, if I'm lucky, I can write some of this out of my system. Writing is creation, creating something from nothing. Putting words together, making sentences, trying to explain the whirring of the mind. Trying to reach across the chasm of nothingness and derive meaning from the void. Trying to make contact with the collective - trying to feel the oneness of the universe.

When the pandemic started I lost all ability to create. I couldn't bring myself to paint, to play music, to write. I sat, and stewed, and drank. I couldn't read a book. Long fiction was too much to try and take in. If I didn't have weekly beers with one of my closest friends I would have gone far more insane than I have, but still, as I noted, the mental health isn't good.

I believe more than anything it is the stupidity, the abject stupidity that a large enough portion of the country seems to have embraced. This weird fucking notion that science is no good and we should trust random idiots on the internet over an actual process that yields results through trial and error and a whole lot of study. People listen to Joe fucking Rogan for medical advice? What the fuck? I can't even begin to understand that. He is a television host and a podcaster, why would anyone trust his medical advice? Even Joe Rogan says not to trust his medical advice, but here we are. I don't get that.

So much I don't get and my brain seizes up trying to make sense of that which cannot be made sense of. I wish I could accept it. Accept and move on, people are fueled by emotions and will trust something one of their friends read on the internet over what some egghead in Washington D.C. has to say. I sort of get that, but I also rail against it. I want data, research, studies, and that's what the eggheads in D.C. are looking at before the get on TV and say what they have to say.

I'm writing again, so that's something. I really hope it grows into something productive, something that helps me, and helps you, if you're reading this.

That Time I went to a Donald Trump Rally

Trump Rally
Friday, June 3rd
Redding Municipal Airport, Redding, CA

So at about 10 in the morning of Friday June 3^rd, I was goofing around on FaceBook and sort of threatening to go to the Trump rally in Redding when I looked at the information page and realized it started at 1 p.m. In that instant I decided I was going to go.

I guess I was sort of confused about how long it would take to get to Redding from Los Molinos so I more or less ran in, told my wife Trish I was heading to the Trump rally in Redding, to which she responded "be careful and don't buy anything..." in her defense she was sort of half asleep when I told her, and then I left.

I was talking about really dressing the part: Olive drab jumpsuit, American flag/bald eagle ball-cap, Redwing work boots - but I felt like I was pressed for time so I left as I was dressed - black boot-cut polyester Wranglers, camouflaged foam clogs, and my Pabst Blue Ribbon tee shirt. No shower, two-day stubble. Oh well.

Then I was on the road, heading north up I-5. I overestimated the time it would take to get there and ended up in a make-shift grass parking lot outside the Redding Municipal Airport by 10:45 - Trump was scheduled to speak at 1:00 p.m. - 2 + hours to go.

The first thing that really hits me is the largest American flag I've ever seen suspended from a two hundred foot high crane stationed in the middle of the parking lot. I walk right under it - the cable holding the flag is attached to a massive concrete block. I look up at this incredible old glory on steroids and get vertigo. What am I getting myself into? In a bit of a daze I stumble off towards the entrance to the airport.

I hit my first obstacle when I attempted to enter. I was asked for a ticket. Huh? I explained "I don't have a ticket, can I buy one?" (Immediately contradicting Trish's second directive). The lady sort of laughed and pitied me. She said, "no, you can download one for free and then show your phone to the security guards" to which I replied "I don't have a phone." Which is true, sort of. I have a $10 TracFone, but it doesn't really do internet - it barely does phone calls. The lady talked to another guy who then said he'd talk to the fucking secret service!

I'm like what, so I stand there for a while with my thumb up my ass wondering if I have driven out here for nothing. I'm watching all these people filter in past me. After a few minutes of me standing around feeling dumb, this really tall dude in a black suit, sunglasses, and a red Trump hat comes over and asks me a few questions:

"Are you a Trump supporter?"

"Sure I am."

"Really?"

"Sure. I mean, I'm really excited to see him speak." A couple of lies and a truth. I was excited to see the whole thing. The secret service guy gives me the once over and then says, "sure, go on in." After that we exchanged pleasantries for the rest of the event. He was perfect for the job because he was so tall he could look over the whole crowd and check everything out. He was probably about 6'7" or 6'8" tall. He was really nice.

Anyway, I'm in. Almost immediately I run into Doug LaMalfa, or current Representative, who has already blocked me from his FaceBook page because I was being an asshole about something. He doesn't know this of course. I stand there waiting for him to finish chatting with someone else and then I extend my hand, "Mr. LaMalfa, pleased to meet you." And we shake hands and I introduce myself and he sees my shirt and says "Pabst Blue Ribbon, I bet speaker of the house Paul Ryan would like that shirt, I think they're from Wisconsin." That doesn't sound right to me, but I'm like "yeah, I think they've been sold a time or two since then." I wanted to say something about how I think now maybe they're owned by a Russian company and globalism and LaMalfa's like "yeah, whatever." But he was cordial. All these politicians are smooth talkers.

So now I'm past LaMalfa and just figuring out what's going on.

I laugh as I realize the booming PA system is cranking REM's "It's the end of the world as we know it..." There's a podium set up and a couple of water stations and some shade, porta-potties, and a whole stage right in the middle of the spectating area reserved for the press. Press people are milling around, taking photos, talking to people. I met a photographer for the New York Times. He was really generous with his time and gave me a run-down on the whole affair - he'd been following Trump on this particular leg of the campaign tour. “He'll usually speak for about an hour,” the photographer informs me. “But he might cut it short today because it's so hot.”

I ran into Gregory Cheadle – he's a candidate for the California 1st District Congressional seat. His simple campaign signs feature the silhouette of the famous DaVinci sculpture called "The Thinker," and below that it the one-word slogan: "THINK." I always assumed he'd be kind of a stern guy but it turns out he's really warm. I was like "hey Mr. Cheadle, it's an honor to meet you," because I'm adept at glad-handing and he responded: "Call me Gregory, I don't do all these 'misters.'" Then he laughed and clapped me on the shoulder and I really liked that interaction. I'm telling you, these pols know how to work people.

[note: I had left the rally before the “there's my African-American” comment that the national media has siezed on. According to the Redding Searchlight it was Cheadle to whom that comment from Trump was directed.]

I recognized Summer Schapelle in the audience and fan-boyed on her a little bit - she is a terrific singer from Redding who was featured on the last season of "The Voice." Man, the who's who of Redding were in attendance for Mr. Trump.

There was a plane on the tarmac but it was kind of run-down looking. I asked my friend the secret service guy if that was Trump's plane and he answered "No, his plane says "TRUMP" on it" and I was like "duh," but I didn't say that out loud. "That's the press plane," he explained. Aha.

I spoke with a couple of reporters from a publication out of Paris. I won't mention the name because this next part might be kind of libelous, or slander? I'm not sure which. Anyway, I'm talking to a reporter and a photographer and the photographer says "it's hot." And I answer "yeah." It is about 104 degrees, which really for June in Redding is no big deal. It can get as high as 115. The photographer is sweating like a pig, obviously not used to this kind of weather. Then the reporter says to me "are you a Trump supporter" and I say, "no, not really. I'm more of a politics junkie." Then jokingly I say "I'll pretend I am if you want me to." And he goes: "Really?" I'm a little flabbergasted at this point, because yeah, sure I used to make up sources when I wrote articles for my high-school newspaper, but this is a guy from a real paper. He told me they were looking for a whole family of Trump supporters. I ended up saying "well, you'll probably find one here." I sort of wish I'd faked the interview for them, because it would be really funny to find the article and then tell people "that was me! That was all me!" But they'd probably think I was lying anyway. I swear that anecdote is true.

I had a lot of time to walk around and talk to people. I talked to a friendly man for awhile about our shared enjoyment of the author Michael Connelly, and a few others. Neither of us like Patterson. Too schmarmy. I can tell I am not the only non-Trump supporter here, I feel like I am sharing conspiratorial winks here and there, but nobody is here to cause trouble. This is Redding after all, as someone says "Trump Country." It turns out to have been a very safe place to go and take in this phenomenon. There are some hard looking dudes though - I see a lot of veterans, some genuine hill-folk, and a fair share of muscle-men sporting prison tattoos. These people look like if there was some trouble, they wouldn't mind jumping into it. But there isn't, this is a tame crowd. The atmosphere is mostly jovial, excited, under control. Aside from that the heat keeps everyone either crowding under the shade tents or gasping for breath.

"You Shook me all Night Long" blasts through the PA system.

People had absolutely tremendous t-shirts on. I so wish I'd brought my camera just for that, but I blazed out without even thinking about it. Here's a list of the ones I can remember:

Chairman Oba-Mao (with a picture of a smiling Obama in a Chairman Mao style hat)

GUNS AND MOSES (Guns and Roses, get it, huh? Huh?)

Hillary for Prison 2016 - which was funny because it looked exactly like a Hillary for President shirt and so people kept asking this guy if he was a Hillary supporter when in fact he was one of the more kooky, hate-filled human beings at the rally. I heard him sputtering something about "pedophile and serial rapist..." as I slowly edged away from him.

A really tall, big dude was wearing a shirt that read: "THE FEW, THE PROUD, THE TAXPAYERS." I got a terrific laugh out of that one.

There were a ton of Jefferson shirts, and a lot of basic "Trump for President" shirts.

But I think my favorite shirt of the evening featured a kind of a stylized picture of Trump's head and a caption reading:

TRUMP - THERE WILL BE HELL TOUPEE

http://rlv.zcache.com/donald_trump_2016_therell_be_hell_tou…
(her's was better than this, but it was the closest I could find)

I would think that shirt would be insulting to Trump but the woman wearing it seemed to be a full on Trump supporter.

Later on I struck up a conversation with a couple of reporters from "InfoWars." One dude looked super hard. I wouldn't want to fuck with him. I was like "oh, infowars, I like that site!" Which was kind of a lie.

There was only really one agitator there, this one guy who frankly I think is kind of giving Sanders' supporters a bad name. He came in a Sanders' shirt, which was no big deal, no one I saw really cared. But he was acting sketchy, prancing around, getting in people's faces, then filming it the whole time.

Most of the people there were just laughing or bored with him, a few people reacted, but there was nothing physical. I tried to talk to the guy for a second but he was really weird, he wouldn't talk. It seemed evident to me he came with the intention of creating a scene so he could exploit it. My friend the secret service guy talked to him a bunch of times, I was right next to them as it happened. The secret service guy was assuring the Sanders shirt dude that "you're welcome to stay, but you can't be making other people uncomfortable."

Well as you and I could probably guess the guy kept pushing it until the security guards and the secret service really had no choice but to escort him out to the parking lot. At that point he turned on his camera and filmed himself, pointed it at the cops and the secret service, and basically created a scene that was way out of proportion to what had really transpired. A few people yelled at him on the way out, but it was pretty half-hearted.

I'm a little saddened to see that he has since posted a video of the episode, completely mis-characterizing how he acted and how he was treated - claiming he was kicked out solely because he was wearing a Sanders shirt. From my point of view that was not at all how it went down. Guy clearly came with an agenda.

Funny thing to me though, if you're going to agitate, at least have the self-control to wait until the candidate actually shows up. Trump was still an hour away when they escorted the guy out to the parking lot.

Whatever.

A local representative comes out at about quarter til and gives an invocation. I bow my head and sort of marvel at the surrealism of it all - thank you whatever weird lord thing coincidence or scientific serendipity put me here on this planet at this time to witness this bizarre marvel of human interaction. What the fucking fuck am I doing here?

A few minutes later someone leads us through the Pledge of Allegiance - right hand or left? Right, right? Fuck, elementary school indoctrination don't fail me now. I whiff on "indivisible" but I don't think anyone notices.

Anyway, now we're getting close to the big show. People are getting excited - it's 1:00 o'clock, still no Donald. Up until now the music had been mostly classic rock - AC/DC, Stones, Neil Young. Suddenly it changes to a huge, booming symphony of horns and drums. I don't know what it is, but Wagner-esque - though that would be too on the nose! 1:10, a gleam on the horizon, here comes the Donald! His Boeing 757 even looks golden in the early afternoon light.

The plane comes in low as if making to land, 50 feet off the ground, and then re-ascends, off into the sky! It makes a giant circle as it flies around the airport, around the city. For a moment it flies before Mount Shasta, ghostly in the distance, then it flies above the massive American flag in the parking lot. It probably takes 10 minutes for the plane to make the circle and then it is coming in for landing again. Everyone is awestruck, myself included. A fellow rally-goer leans over to me and exclaims: “That's what you do when you're a billionaire!” The PA is still blasting that crazy symphony music, on repeat, looped. I mean, it is a spectacle, this is big. Say what you will about Donald Trump but that motherfucker knows how to make a goddamn entrance!

The second time around I feel like the plane is going to do another fake-out on us, maybe they won't even land, but it does! People are going apoplectic. People are jumping up and down, young women are shedding tears of ecstasy! I have to admit a tear welled up in the corner of my eye - not because of Trump, but just that fucking majesty of the spectacle! It was huge! It was crazy! It was so much larger than life it was hard to even fathom. The music is still blaring as the plane slowly turns and makes it's way back towards the podium. It stops, someone is wheeling the stairwell towards the door.

The door opens! There's a white haired man there - the Donald? Of course not, Trump doesn't open the door of his own plane. The man signals for the people maneuvering the staircase to bring it closer, then it is connected. An entourage of men in suits descends and the people are going bananas! I'm laughing at this point, the whole thing is so fucking over the top!

Six guys cruise out, then seven, eight, looking rich, well fed, well bred, groomed, immaculate manifestations of wealth and power.

Then finally the Donald!

Moving a little slower than the rest, looking a little heavier, but so eminently recognizable, donning his newest ball-cap, this one a gift from the NRA in recognition of their recent endorsement.

The speech, I dunno, it gets a little anti-climactic at this point. He does the prerequisite "Redding! We love Redding!" bullshit. I appreciate the fact that Donald speaks extemporaneously - this is not your classic scripted, practiced stump speech. He is definitely talking off the cuff, and that's refreshing. He starts out with a statistic from a job report that came out yesterday and segues from there. The problem with a totally off the cuff speech though is that it's also sort of non-cohesive. He isn't really explaining policy but more or less bouncing from one hot button issue to the next. But the crowd eats it up. At some point he pisses me off because he keeps referring to the Warriors as "San Francisco's basketball team." He says it twice and after the second time I shout "OAKLAND!" to which the audience looks around as if someone is speaking in a foreign language but no one seems to pin-point me precisely. Donald doesn't seem to hear me at all, which is probably okay.

He does get a few good zingers in there, ridiculing Hillary for her tele-prompted speech - he repeatedly calls her weak and soft. He sort of gives props to Bernie "We love Bernie, what a mess he's got going there." At one point he gets into Hillary's e-mail stuff and then manages to wrap Huma Abedin, Hillary's right-hand woman, and her husband Anthony Wiener into the mix.

"I wouldn't want to get any tweets from Anthony Wiener," Trump states. "Would you?" The crowd erupts. I'm laughing. The guy is fucking funny. He definitely knows how to work a crowd.

I come to think about it after this speech, which was really just a ramble, and I think part of Trump's attraction lies in the fact that he is sort of like those ink blot tests - you see what you want to see. He shifts his positions so fluidly and consistently he is bound to say something you want to hear. He said a couple of things that I totally agree with - he said we should negotiate with North Korea. "Why not?" He asks, then adds: "I wouldn't go over there!" But then he goes on: "Maybe nothing good comes out of it, maybe something good comes out of it." Then in classic Donald fashion "I'm pretty sure something good would come out of it."

He makes some common sense arguments: "Vladimir Putin says I'm a genius and would be a great leader. And the critics tell me I should disavow those statements. Really? He's saying I'm a genius and I'm supposed to disavow that?" I'm laughing as I write this.

But he also says some things that send shivers down my spine: "I don't want Japan to have nuclear weapons, I want Japan to pay us the money that it costs us to defend them." He says the same of South Korea, the Ukraine... it sounds like he's angling the U.S. to enter into some sort of worldwide protection racket. (Then again, maybe we already are. I should talk to the infowars guys about this.)

He touches on the notorious wall, but he knows this is California, so he doesn't dwell on it. "We'll build that wall, don't worry about it," he says dismissively before moving onto the next topic. There are several spontaneous chants of "USA! USA!" The true believers have smiles on their faces stretching from ear to ear. I'm smiling from ear to ear too, but not for the same reasons.

I do sort of zone out at some point. The heat and the crowd and the general bombast of the afternoon have worn me down. Also I'm supposed to tutor at 5:00, which means I have to get back to Los Molinos, shower, change, then head back up to Red Bluff for the afternoon session. I decide to beat it to the door before he finishes his "speech" and beat the traffic. As I leave I hear him ranting about China and Obama, saying he wishes America could do the kinds of things China does. That gives me pause.

Then I am out, there are hundreds of people outside - the rally filled up. I hear disgruntled voices as I leave, they aren't letting anyone else in. "This is bullshit" someone opines. Bingo!

It takes me a little while to find my truck and then it takes me a little while to figure out how to get out of the damned dead-grass parking lot. But I'm off the lot by 2:15 and heading down I-5 and letting the old 2-70 air conditioner kick in. Home a little after three, call my client, she asks me: "Can we wait until Monday?" Sweet salvation - liquor store, beer, wine. Olympia is on sale for $6.99 a 12-pack. I'm a tall can of Mickey's and three Oly's in as I write this last sentence.

[final note - after spellchecking and Face-booking this I am now a Mickey's tall-can and 4 Oly's in, and feeling pretty good.]

State of Double Happiness

It’s been just about one full year since Trish and I (with the help of an amazingly generous group of friends) packed up our lives’ accumulated goods and moved up the road from the bustling city of Chico, to the quieter rumblings of small town Los Molinos. The year has seen its share of trials and tribulations, with the good times far outweighing tragedy.

We had the “big burn” in March, along with a keg of Guinness beer. That event went well for the most part; but, in spite of best efforts to evacuate animals living in the pile of tree trunks, a handful of native bluebelly lizards may have been burned. This caused distress within the animal rights community.

Several smaller burns throughout the year helped both to clear vegetation, and release pent up spiritual energy.

We were the victims of our own poor planning when it came to the garlic and potato plots. We planted in the late winter and failed to take into account the shade that would result from the oak trees leafing out. The crops did not produce, and we have since relocated the garlic patch. We have yet to plant more potatoes.

There were several minor plumbing disasters that resulted in an outrageous amount of cursing. We anticipate similar problems going forward.

It would be difficult to count the number of trees that have been planted since our arrival. In a landscape that was comprised only of the one hundred or so, magnificent, mature oaks on the lot, there is now an array of trees: deciduous shade trees, evergreens, fruit trees, ornamentals. Add to this an equal number of shrubs and a plethora of bulbs, and we are on our way to reconstructing the Garden of Eden here in our little portion of the North State.

Easy-E - a 1953 "NAA" (N - Double-A)

A 1953 Ford Jubilee tractor was purchased in the summer, and promptly named “Easy-E.” (The official tractor model is “NAA” or “N double-A.”) A disc harrow was purchased in the fall. We are still in the market for a rotary mower.

A number of structures were erected on the property, and one particularly large and ugly structure, a half-barn, was demolished. A shade arbor, metal shop, and brick barbecue were built, and the construction of a small greenhouse is currently in progress and slated for completion early next month.

Aspirin consumption went way up since the move – and not (primarily) to assuage hangovers. A variety of muscles were strained and pulled in the process of digging holes, tearing out blackberry vines, and lifting heavy objects. In addition there was the infamous “barbed wire through the nose” incident that, fortunately, resulted in no permanent damage or complication.

We also picked up a new family member in the form of a chocolate Labrador named “Kiki.” Bill the black Labrador was not initially thrilled, Kiki’s nose has the scars to prove it, but their relationship has since mellowed.

Going forward, we now have a better overall understanding of the property – where the sun falls, and where the water flows. We anticipate growing a larger amount of crops to be sold and donated.

Mainly we plan to continue to create beauty and spread happiness.

madbob@madbob.com

More "Natural News" Ridiculousness...

I'm going to have to comment on this article. When I read it, it made me wonder if Natural News is the "alternative health" counterpart to the cultural eviscerations of the "Onion."

http://www.naturalnews.com/034676_sheeple_study_psychology.html#ixzz1jqjo20yM

The title of the article is:

Study Proves 95% of People Really Are Sheeple...

And it just goes downhill from there. The article sites a limited study in which non-verbally communicative people organized themselves into herds, essentially. In the study, a larger group of people was willing to be lead by a small minority.

That's the study in a nutshell.

Here's the source: http://psychcentral.com/news/2008/02/15/herd-mentality-explained/1922.html

From those facts, the author of the Natural News Article goes on to theorize that this tendency towards herding would lead to our susceptibility to being lead by political leaders, and to being taken in by con-men; to falling for political cover-ups, to falling for phony conspiracy theories. This paragraph has got to be the height of irony:

"Scary. Are we such sheeple that we allow a few "informed" people to lead us around without even knowing what's happening? Sadly, it makes sense. How many fall for scams of all kinds because of friends or "informed" sources, from pyramid schemes to religious hoaxes and political coverups. We seem to believe just about anything, or blindly tolerate it as long as the message is delivered with enough social credibility."


You've got to know a little bit about Natural News to understand the irony - this site consistently peddles fear to its audience. Articles routinely propose the idea that the government will be rounding up American citizens, illegally detaining us, forcibly vaccinating us with mind controlling agents, etc. The agenda is not even subtle.

I think what you have to do here, to see where the article is so far off base, is... you have to try and clear your mind. Then read the study first, the article's source. After you've read the study, go back and read the article, and see if the conclusions the author draws, from the limited parameters of the study, are the same as the conclusions you might draw.

Anyway - I'll expand on this later. I think it's pretty obvious that I have some serious doubts regarding the Natural News author's conclusions. Aside from that, the title certainly suggests that the article is being marketed to a relatively select audience.

Seriously, this article leaves me thinking: if there are sheeple, they are the ones buying into this story.

Smoke and Fog

Moon at night, falling around the Earth

I've spent the better part of the evening worrying a chancre sore with my tongue. It's on the lower right side of my mouth; inside, on the gums. The sore feels huge, but I don't think it's really as big as my tongue thinks it is. Tongue feels huge. My whole head feels big.

There is often a low-hanging mist in the air when you drive into the small town of Los Molinos. We like to play the guessing game: “Smoke, or fog?” Lately it's been mostly smoke. I wouldn't take a bet on fog for less than five to one odds, and even then I think it would be a giveaway.

Starting to get a glimpse of some of the movements swirling around. We got into a strong current of dissatisfaction and demonstration, and that seems to be disseminating towards debate and strategy. “Strategy” is probably too conscious of a word to describe it – the thing is more fluid than the word strategy evokes. It is sometimes painfully confusing.

Sign of the Times

Word on the street has it that Representative Wally Herger is retiring from Congress, after something like a quarter of a century of service. I've written to Herger on occasion, and always received a prompt and polite response. They typically include the phrase: “and even though we may not see eye to eye on many of today's important issues...” somewhere in the closing paragraph.  I appreciate the effort anyway, and the stationary is very nice – thick, quality paper.

Representative Wally Herger has announced his plan to retire from Congress

I'd read that as a sign – the old way moving on. Even though another old-way advocate will likely take his place, it's still a dramatic shift. It's something worth paying attention to. Old people in new roles might be more receptive to change. But I am afraid sometimes that these guys play the same game. They've become entrenched. One begets the other begets the other. Even when one side takes power from the other, the arguments still stay the same. You could have followed the same thought processes in 1970, or 1930. Are we moving forward at all?

Dance for Rain

There's very little moisture in the soil and less in the air. Even though the plants and trees are mostly bare and dormant, they still need weekly watering. Water is what we need right now, in any form: snow, rain, sleet, fog, hail, drizzle, slush; we need it to knock some of this smoke out of the air.

Phenakistoscope - Waltzing Dancers
 click image to view animation.

The Quiet Revolution

You know I think, I hope, I pray that we can do this thing, that we can make this transition here with a minimal amount of violence. Violence, some people say it's necessary, but I don't know about that. That seems to be a circular way of thinking. It's a logical loop; someone is committing violence against you, you strike back at them. But it's endless, and hopeless. Violence always begets more violence, until someone decides to walk away... Can you really walk away?

I think you have to.

madbob@madbob.com

$16.50 The Hard Way

Scrap Metal Yard - Recycling at it's Most Basic

After eggnog season I had a few days off.

I had piles of rusted, tangled barbed wire coiled in heaps around the yard. I managed to jam all that wire into the bed of my Toyota pick-up, and on Thursday morning I headed to a surplus metal buyer in Orland. First I drove into the yard, where  two men unloading material informed me I had to go get my truck weighed first. No big deal, I reversed the truck on out and waited for the scale to clear.

I parked on a metal plate and went into the office where a  young woman adjusted a series of metal plates and weights to determine how much the truck weighed. She said I was good and off I went, into the yard, to unload my scrap.

I was eager to help and I'd brought my gloves with me. The wire was all in a tangled mess that I felt uneasy about. I started wrenching and pulling the metal out. I had really rammed it in there – my strategy was pure laziness: instead of having to tie the load down, I'd let the wire do the work; and so I'd stomped it down into the truck to make sure it wouldn't pop free. It was tough, but I was making progress, pulling out the chain link fencing one roll at a time. Then I got to a pocket of barbed wire. It was tangled and interconnected with some hogwire and some more barbed wire. I was pulling hard, and it wasn't budging. I gave it a real powerful tug, and then I glanced something flashing by, and then there was a feeling of pulling on my nose.

A loose end of the barbed wire had shot free from the truck bed and whipped into my face, in such a way that a barb entered into my nostril, pierced the nostril's inside wall, and then the end of it poked out through the fleshy end of the septum. I was effectively hooked.

There was almost no pain; but there was blood, and I couldn't figure out how to get the wire out of my nose. My initial reaction was to pull, but that was wrong, because the barb was pointing down. I had to figure out from which direction the wire had entered, and then push it back that way. It took me a while to figure this out. I removed my glove to free my fingers. Slightly panicky, I tried pulling on the wire a couple more times, straight down. I felt my nose stretching, but the wire was not even close to pulling through. The attendant in the yard was getting concerned, and he called to his colleague, but then I got the wire moving in the right direction and was freed. A few thick droplets of blood ran down over my lips and mouth, and then onto my jacket.

“Man, I hope your day gets better.” The attendant told me sincerely.

madbob@madbob.com

Some Conspiracy Theory Links...

These are links explaining how to construct a good conspiracy. Anyone who finds themselves believing the bevvy of conspiracy theories swirling around out there today really ought to read through a few of these.

First there is the word

Pareidolia

http://www.skepdic.com/pareidol.html

Here is a really good article that goes into detail about the various elements that conspiracy theory authors will use to convince an audience of their story:

http://warp.povusers.org/grrr/conspiracytheories.html

Here is a great, concise article on how not to be suckered by the people pushing conspiracy theories:

http://warp.povusers.org/grrr/tools_against_conspiracy_theories.html

You know I'm really getting tired of trying to debunk bad logic. So many conspiracies are based on a negative assumption. I can't prove a negative. I can't prove to you that Bill Gates is not trying to euthanize the world with vaccines. I can tell you with 99.999999% certainty that he is not, but there is always that minute possibility that he is in fact an evil serial killer and so good at it that no one is catching him.

I can't prove to you that the government is not rounding people up ad hoc and forcibly vaccinating them. Sure there is absolutely zero fact-based evidence to prove this is happening, but that doesn't mean the government isn't doing it, and they are just so good at covering it up that no one has found out.

Staggering. It is amazing to me what people will choose to believe. I shake my head...

What’s with the Fear?

An Examination of the Motives behind Fear Mongering

I’ve been tripping out lately on all the fear-mongering and paranoia that has been percolating up on the internet and elsewhere. It’s easy enough to disprove a lot of the whacked out nonsense you hear, but ultimately it had me asking the question: Why?

Why are there people out there who are hell-bent on spreading fear and generating an climate of distrust and paranoia? Well I think some people probably do it just for kicks, for the ego stroke, for the challenge of writing a story that becomes accepted by a segment of the population. I’m a writer of fiction myself. I’ve made false documentaries; I’ve published phony news stories. My work is generally tongue in cheek and, even if the falsities are not detected, more of a goof than a nefarious tool of chaos. But still, I can understand the mentality of the creator of fiction who gets their rocks off by spreading falsehoods. It’s fun and satisfying to write a piece that is constructed well enough to be believable.

But there is a more pragmatic motive behind some of the misleading information out there: loyalty. If you monger in fear, and paint yourself as the shining ray of truth in a sea of lies, and if you do it well enough, you will eventually attract an audience of people who trust you, and only you.

This loyalty can be used for a variety of different ends. If you are the host of a radio program that purports to tell its audience the truth behind conspiracies and weird phenomenon, that loyalty manifests itself into an audience that boosts your ratings, and allows you to sell advertising to your sponsors.

If you are a self-proclaimed health guru who exposes to your audience the schemes and cynicism behind modern health care, you can use the loyalty of your audience to sell health supplements and books.

If you are a government, you can use fear of insidious enemies lurking in the shadows to foster loyalty to a police state, all in the name of “security.”

The problem with loyalty is that it comes at the expense of freedom. You trade your free will when you pledge your allegiance to a figure or cause. You lost your rights when you give into fear. Not just your government guaranteed rights, but your ingrained human rights – your right to be in harmony, to be at peace, to be happy. Fear destroys those rights.

The truth will set you free – because the truth is the truth. It is not disputable, it only is. Seek the truth and you need pledge no other fealty.

madbob@madbob.com

Is Bill Gates Aspiring to be the Greatest Mass Murderer In History?

Misconceptions and Paranoia in a Culture of Fear and Doom

I have been hearing a variety of vicious and insidious rumors of late regarding vaccinations. Three recent conspiracies have been proposed to me for consideration.

The first is the idea that Bill Gates is using vaccinations around the world as some sort of plot to either sterilize, or exterminate, 10 to 15% of the world’s population.

The second is that vaccinations are being used to intentionally spread cancer, and were used to introduce AIDS to the population.

And the third is that citizens of Maryland are having their children rounded up and forced into sort of vaccination detention camps, complete with armed guards and “attack dogs” to ensure that the populations receives their shots.

I am pretty well convinced that all three of these theories are completely bogus, and are being peddled by the fear mongers who are bent on fostering an atmosphere of paranoia and chaos. I will take them one at a time:

Is Bill Gates a Mass Murderer?

This one makes me shake my head. The fuel for the fire is a quote, clearly taken intentionally out of context, from Bill Gates regarding the effectiveness of vaccinations in helping to curb population growth. Here’s the quote:

“If we do a really great job on new vaccines, health care, reproductive health services, we could lower that by perhaps 10 or 15 per cent.”

People have interpreted this phrase to mean that Bill Gates is either actively sterilizing, or actively euthanizing, poor people around the world.

Here’s another idea. Preventing childhood diseases lowers infant and child mortality. Reducing child mortality means families don’t have to have a dozen children in order to ensure that three of them make it to adult-hood. The downward pressure to procreate reduces population. Do you really think people in poor countries really want to have large families with extra mouths to feed?

Do Vaccinations Cause Cancer and AIDS?

The only “proof” I saw of this claim came in the form of a dubious article from an “alternative news” site, and a hackneyed YouTube video. The reason I even clicked on the video link is because the article said there was proof of vaccinations causing AIDS in the form of a vaccine scientist actually admitting as much “on camera.” The video was typical paranoid drivel – a series of still photos with the ominous underlying music: gruesome photos of dead bodies and mayhem. The doctor “speaking on camera” was voice only, and a scratchy recording at that, running underneath the still photos. At that point, any credibility the article might have had was already dashed – but don’t let the facts stand in the way of a good rant.

Are Unvaccinated Children in Maryland being Herded into Detention Camps?

God, enough with the detention camps already. I don’t know who started this stuff, but give them credit, they sparked a real wildfire in the fringe communities on the far left and the far right.

In this twist on the story, unvaccinated children are literally being herded into camps staffed by armed soldiers and “attack dogs,” where they are then forcibly inoculated.

As with any good conspiracy story, there is a germ of truth to this one. A sheriff in one county of Maryland did indeed issue subpoenas targeting the parents of unvaccinated children. These parents are meant to have their children vaccinated within a certain time frame, under threat of a fine, or possible jail time.

First, it isn’t state wide. Second, I’m pretty sure it’s not legal, and that under legitimate legal challenge, these subpoenas will likely be dropped. Still, makes for some good fear mongering.

My Thoughts on Vaccinations

Look, I think there is plenty of room to question current vaccination policy. I think we likely over-vaccinate. My understanding is that some of the vaccines administered routinely are for diseases that rarely manifest. I think it is important that we critically examine the connection between vaccine administration and “Big Pharma.” Do I think vaccines can cause autism? Maybe. It seems to me that most studies say no, some studies say possibly. Intuition tells me that giving an infant or a child 40+ doses of vaccine at once could have harmful side effects. So the amount we vaccinate, and how we apply those vaccines, is ripe area for debate.

But do I think vaccinations are an insidious form of population control, that spread cancer, sterilize people, kill people, cause AIDS? No, I think that’s ludicrous. Vaccines have staved off incredibly destructive childhood diseases: Polio, mumps, measles, rickets, and more. Why would you target those diseases for eradication, only to replace them with cancer or AIDS? It makes no sense.

That’s the thing with all of these conspiracy theories; they  start with a theory in mind, then use circular logic, twisted logic paths, innuendo and conjecture to bolster that theory. It’s bad logic, junk science – it preys on the innate desire of the human mind to make connections. The conspiracy theorists peddle fear and confusion; they seek to make chaos out of order. They seek to spread fear and loathing through the population.

madbob@madbob.com

The Girl with the Drake Tattoo

Makes as much sense an anything else this year

Well damn – only a couple more of these to go and we are done with the year 2011. Onto twenty twelve – is your bunker well stocked and secure? I'm serious, mine is woefully inadequate at the moment, so I am looking for more prepared souls whom I can latch onto When the Shit Hits the Fan (hereafter referred to as WTSHTF, in case I may need to use it later on in this piece). Ah but that's alright, come what may, makes not a bit of difference. Right now I've got a fire going, two lazy dogs trading places beneath my feet, a good looking woman reading a novel on the couch, and a one-third full mug of stiff eggnog; and plenty more where that came from. Live in the moment, and this moment is pretty damn good.

A Bit of Politics

“Seeming to do is not doing.”

-Thomas A. Edison

I can't resist – the longer this Republican race goes on, the less able I am to avert my eyes. It reminds me of Charlie and the Chocolate factory, with all of the candidates riding along and being ejected, one by one, in these increasingly horrifying scenarios. Okay, well, really only Herman Cain has ejected in a truly dramatic fashion thus far – but there are so damned many of them! The potential is there! And then  that humanoid bobble-head “The Donald” comes jamming himself into the picture every so often, making preposterous statements, causing a ruckus, and then disappearing back behind the curtain; probably feeling like some kind of discombobulated Machiavelli. He's amazing though in that he doesn't actually do anything. Then, of course, there is the specter of Sarah Palin lurking back there somewhere. They really ought to just declare the “fuck it” ticket and run a Trump/Palin or vice-versa package. They could pay down the debt by broadcasting a reality television show from the White House – primo advertising; get some Kardashian style money that way. Didn't I mention something about WTSHTF earlier? In the immortal words of George W. Bush: “BRING IT ON!”

Curses and Passion

Oh fuck me. This is not the direction I'd intended to go with this column. But I didn't plan a direction when I started, and so now the energy is just going where it's going. That's what happens when you send energy off unfocused, undirected, leaderless. Passion makes for a great seduction, and passion can lead to a vicious and bloody killing spree. I used to really make a point of not using too much foul language in these columns, but at this point, what's the difference? I mean, some cracked out chick got DRAKE tattooed across her forehead, and some tattoo “artist” was willing to take her money to do that – so what genuine panic is an f-bomb here, or the s-word there, going to create?

There is nothing shocking anymore; not when there is death and mayhem, blood and putrefaction running on the nightly news. The year 2012 is almost upon us and we still haven't figured out how to solve our differences without tearing one another limb from limb. So Merry Fucking Christmas.

Here's an oldie of the author, post holiday panic

madbob@madbob.com

Ho Ho Horror...

Why is there Never a Decent Panic Room Nearby When you Need One?

Okay, okay, let's see. My mind is a spinning whir of mud and mash right now. Between the insane political and economic phase we are in, and the manic holiday climate, it is wine wine wine for me. I hate this time of year - I really do. The holidays freak me out. I mean, I'm limping through the year, barely making the bills, the weather turns cold, I'm drinking more, trying to stay warm, getting desperate for some reprieve. I find myself wandering through the aisles at the 99 cent store looking for anything that will substitute for comfort food, and then the goddamn Christmas music starts playing – so fucking happy, joyous, maniacal. Bells, and choirs, and BELLS. I'm staggering and lurching, knocking over the damned Tupperware and wrapping paper in a panicked frenzy trying to get the HELL OUT OF THERE!!!

Deep breaths - I feel it coming on. I should be listening to calm, soothing music on the radio, but I can't turn away from the endless babble and chatter about the politics. Herman Cain, Herman Cain, Herman Cain. Jesus, the funniest thing I've heard in weeks was Herman Cain saying he was looking forward to “getting back on message.” Jesus. Europe is collapsing. Stock market down, stock market up. Jesus Christ.

OWS Blues

I feel like I'm on the outside looking in with this OWS stuff. I support the movement, for the free exchange of ideas it has generated, if nothing else. I get the general idea – people are fed up with a government that caters to special interests at the expense of the people. I've been upset about that for shit, as long as I've been politically aware. But the OWS movement also disturbs me. It seems like something of a Rorschach test in that it can mean anything to anyone. There are those who simply want to reform the current system of representative democracy, and those who want to abolish everything and start over. I can respect both of those points of view.

And then there are the doomsayers and conspiracy theorists who have latched onto the movement. They offer no solutions, no way forward, simply a myriad of demons and bogeyman that are enslaving us all in insidious, self-defeating webs of deceit and mysticism. These folks will make your head explode. I frankly don't get their way of thinking. If they are right, if we are all pawns in the game of some unseen caste of mystics who have been controlling events since the middle ages, then what the fuck is the point? I'm sure they've got it figured out; or else some tripper hero like Neo from the fucking Matrix will sort it out... or maybe we all are inanimate, living in pods, and being kept alive for feed? Again, what's the point?

I can't let myself believe that kind of stuff. I like solutions, I am a fan of action, and recourse. I like to feel like there is a way forward, a way up, a way out.

But on a serious note, how the hell am I going to get my Christmas shopping done this year?

madbob@madbob.com

Flickering Lights

The days are getting shorter. I'm cold right now. The sun went down about an hour ago and the fire is only beginning to cut through the bite of the encroaching cold air. I'm on the verge of shivers. My wife told me years back that this time of year, starting in around October, and running through, I don't know, about now I guess – it's the time when the worlds of the dead and of the living are in the closest proximity. Of course I could go and throw on a coat. The dogs are fine – they've got their fur wrapped around them. Right now they are prancing around the room and sniffing furiously; then sucking up any morsels of edible and semi-edible objects they discover. They lick at stains. I'm sure we feed them enough. They don't look too thin. I think we all burn more energy out here than we ever used to. The simple act of walking from one end of the property to the other provides exercise like I haven't really had in many, many years – I'm thinking decades.

There's horror on the evening news: footage of violence in Syria as people rise up against the government, folks shot through, bloodied bandages over a hollowed eye, crimson flowers blooming and expanding across polyester/cotton blend fabric shirts. A piece on cancer, the kill or be killed nature of that disease; vicious crimes against children, stories of unanswered pleas for salvation; and profiles of the current crop of political candidates, grinning, manicured ghouls.

God It's a Freak Show

Makes you shudder right down to the bones.

I've got a jacket on now – dogs and I went outside for a bit. We've been talking about post-traumatic stress disorder. It's that loop phenomenon the brain can get into when you've been heavily effected by something done, heard, seen; experienced. Maybe that's trivializing it, I don't think so. Our brains; we are meant to be happy, and harmonious. When things happen that knock us out of harmony, then it sends us off into waves, or loops. Like when you swing your arms for balance. Sometimes you have to keep on swinging.

Dancing around the Apple Tree...

Then this holiday season – it's like on top of everything else they want you to maneuver yourself through an obstacle course of commitments. Battle the crowds, get the gifts together, get them out – the final sputtering, fits and spasms of the year's cycle of consumer capitalism – the chaotic, orgasmic ending – just the post-coital eruption of champagne and high-spirited inebriation of the New Year events left to go.

And then we'll do it all again. One way or the other. We move in circles, not lines. We spin and spin together through this universe (universes? multi-verses?). One big swirling mass – infinite parts and pieces – everything larger, everything smaller, forever and ever.

All we have to do is be. And the good news is, we can't not be. So congratulations! You've done it.

madbob@madbob.com

Who Needs OWS? We've Got Papandreou...

(Originally published November 2, 2011)

This year’s final harvest is over. Trish and I spent some time over the weekend tearing out old, spent plants and vines, and gathering what tangible fruit that was left: tomatoes, squash (zucchini, acorn, and blue), an assortment of beans, and a pumpkin. I suppose the pumpkin is technically a squash as well, but this time of year they feel like they ought to have their own category.

We also turned a little earth and planted winter vegetables: cabbage, cauliflower, broccoli, chard, lettuce, garlic and onions. We’re surrounding the winter beds with a ring of diatomaceous earth; it is a fine, silicone powder used in pool filtration systems. Word is that snails and slugs will not crawl over the sharp powder. So far it seems to be working fine, but it’s too early to qualify that experiment as a raving success just yet.

There is more to plant, but I think we’re off to a good start.

Forget OWS, We’ve got Greece

The protesters are still occupying Wall Street, as well as venues across the country; including right here in the Chico downtown plaza. After this week though I’d say the protesters can wrap it up and go home – it looks like Greece is going to single-handedly bring the Wall Street banks to their knees. This is really an incredible story.

Greece has been teetering on the brink of economic collapse for years now, but because they are part of the European Union, there is a real vested interest in righting their listing ship. As a result, the countries in the European Union convened a summit and, amazing, arrived at, at least a framework, for a solution to Greek’s problems. It was a huge, complicated deal, and entailed major sacrifices from a number of countries and investors. It also required continued “austerity measures” on the part of the Greek government – meaning basically that the government can’t spend a dime. This has caused major civil unrest – but the feeling is that, while it is a bitter pill to swallow, the deal will eventually allow Greece to get out of debt and eventually prosper economically in a way the country never has before.

Enter Greek Prime Minister George Papandreou. After praising the overall framework for the deal, and applauding the generosity of other countries involved, Papandreou has made a political move described by experts as: “bizarre,” “schizophrenic,” and “mystifying.” The Prime Minister has decided to hold a public referendum on the overall bail-out package and, ultimately, whether or not Greece should remain in the European Union.  The announcement has completely scuttled all the hard work of those involved in structuring the bail-out package, and may end up costing Papandreou his job. The citizens of Greece will vote later this week on whether or not they continue to have confidence in their government. If the current government survives that confidence vote, then the aforementioned referendum on the bail-out will go forward. If the government does not survive the confidence vote, and judging from the Prime Minister’s latest maneuver, they may not, then new election s will have to be held.

Ah well, get used to it. The winds of change are howling.

Madbob@madbob.com

Information Overload leads to Abandoning the Matrix

It seems like eggnog came early this year. I suppose that is how they would do it – I mean the eggnog industry; they’ve got to be paying attention to this trend of pushing Christmas closer each year to the Fourth of July. I think for awhile I was sort of living under the assumption that there were many out there who are ‘not paying attention.’ I’m realizing now that everyone is paying attention – to something.

There is too much. I’ve made half-dozen false-starts on this column – the reason is too much information: too many scandals, crises, wars, elections, icons passing away, natural disasters, medical mysteries, and financial catastrophes. I don’t know where to start; and once you start in, there’s no natural point at which to stop.

So forget it – by the time you read this, everything will have changed anyway.

I just came back from the yard – the dogs and I walked down to the creek under the light of a bright moon. It isn’t full, but it is on its way up and nearly there. That white light of the moon lights up the whole area, so long as there isn’t interference from artificial lighting. It is cold but not unbearable.

I came back with seed pods attached to my stocking cap. There were two of them, oval-shaped , spiky burrs; reddish-brown. They look a lot like caterpillars and that is what Trish thought they were, at first.

“Bob, there’s something…” but before she could finish, I’d swatted my hat away and flung it towards the fireplace. I guess she was trying to say I should be careful, because of the creatures on my head; but I mistook her to mean there was something terrible climbing over my skull – some kind of treacherous venomous spider, or maybe a radioactive, blood-draining mosquito. I take no chances, not this time anyway.

No harm done, then we figured out what they were – burrs.

I lost track of the days today. I’m in the middle of a longer assignment at my job, and so the activities aren’t varying greatly from one day to the next. If I didn’t have a job to go to, I’d never know what day it was. I might be fine with that. Right now I’m thinking the lunar calendar probably makes more sense anyway. There is nothing physical that signifies the passing of a week – it’s completely arbitrary, just a year broken down into mathematically symmetrical components. Following the sun, or the moon, there you’ve got something very real and tangible to go by.

I’ve got a great big wool coat to wear. It belonged to my grandfather, his army coat from 1945; big leather wrapped buttons and a fine, smooth lining of some material, maybe thick silk – I don’t know. It is stiff and warm, though it’s starting to loosen up. No one wore it for a lot of years; it feels very good to wear it now.  This coat makes me look forward to the colder months of winter. I’m wearing that coat right now – sitting outside on the porch; looking at my breath and typing this out on a lap-top my mom gave me recently. Things are starting to look really good around here.

madbob@madbob.com

Smoking Mirrors

Trish and I are in the process of laughing riotously at a letter printed in a recent Enterprise Record. I don't know if it is from a lack of submissions, editor “discretion,” or what, but the Letters to the Editor lately have been closely resembling the random and anonymous babblings that make up the infamous “Tell it to the ER” column. Great and entertaining stuff – our King sitting his royal ass on a bejeweled throne, black supremacy, a thumb up, or a thumb down for the whacked out, maniacal, and desperate “plan of the day.” Come to think of it, it is sort of starting to resemble the fall of the Roman Empire around here - I can smell something, burning in the air.

But that's a myth anyway – the Roman Empire didn't collapse overnight; more accurately it broke up, or eroded away, over a period of time, centuries I think. The Soviet Union had a more abrupt collapse a few decades back, but they seem to be chugging along, a series of confederate countries.

Now the Middle East is on fire. Governments are being overthrown right and left. The latest leader to go is Moammar Ghadaffy – the infamously titled (by President Ronald Reagan):

“Mad Dog of the Middle East.” 

Reagan could turn a phrase. You can start to understand why people still hold him in such high esteem when you hear a phrase like that. It's got alliteration, action, tension. Never mind policy; nobody really has a firm grasp on policy anyway; that's all a bunch of smoke, and mirrors.

People are throwing around a lot of political terminology these days: Capitalism, Socialism, Communism, Anarchy, Direct Democracy, Radical Direct Democracy, Utilitarianism, Fascism, Horizontalism... It can make your head spin trying to keep up with the latest political philosophy to be making the scene on any particular day.

Isms, isms, isms... I'm not sold on all that stuff. All the “isms” seem  to ignore the potential for human miscalculation, confusion, and corruption. Folks act as if choosing the right political and economic theory is going to catapult human-kind into thinking and acting decently towards one another. Sorry y'all – it's entirely the other way around.

Out of Iraq

Well as of the end of this year we are out of Iraq, out military troops anyway. No one seems to know if this is a good thing or a bad thing – it's probably a bit of both. These times, man, there is no satisfaction. I had so many strong opinions ten years ago – now I don't know which way is up. It feels like we're treading in a pool of oil, slogging along, not sure which way to turn. I don't blame the President for this, or the Congress – they are only as confused as the rest of us. We hold something around a 40% approval rating for our sitting President, and around a Nine percent approval rating for the acting Congress. The headline I'm reading says: “Even Congress hates Congress,” and I don't think hate is the right word, but we don't understand ourselves these days.

madbob@madbob